LIFE

I read once...

making a "living" is not the same thing as making a "life"

I got thinking

Am I living or am I making a living?

Do I know what my life is like?

Do I even like my life?

Are my day to day actions creating a life for me or a living?

of course I looked in the dictionary...

LIFE ~ the condition that distinguishes organisms from inorganic objects

LIVING ~ the means of maintaining life 

Our life is like a ball game. Sometimes things get going rough so you call a 'time out' to get reorganized or regrouped, to ask the coach for advice and help. Sometimes our lives get rough and things go wrong so we need to call 'time out' and pray to our Heavenly Father for guidance.

A little boy was trying to lift a big rock. His dad came and asked his son if he was using all his strength. The boy said, 'Yes, but I still can't move it'. The dad said to his son, 'Then you're not using all your strength, because you haven't asked me'.

The Atonement was made

The Atonement was made 

Ever and Always is offers amnesty 

from transgression and from death 

if we will but repent. 

Repentance is the escape clause in it all. 

Repentance is the key with which 

He can unlock the prison from inside.

We hold the key with our hands, and 

agency is ours to use it.

Boyd K Packer 

Fear AND Change

Over the past few days I have been thinking a lot about change. I still maintain the opinion that change is a good thing.

 It helps you grow. It helps you progress. It helps you learn.

Thank goodness I'm not the same person I was two years ago, or even nine months ago. Thank goodness for progression.

Although change is undoubtedly a positive thing, it does bring with it a certain amount of uncertainty.

I think it makes you stronger.

For me, the future is a beautiful thing, however I have this thing called fear of the future. Maybe it's a fear of commitment. Maybe it's just that I've never experienced it so I don't know what to expect.

Whatever the case, it still scares me.

So today I went for a walk. I passed some deer crossing the road. They looked petrified. They stared me down, and the closer I got to them the more uneasy they became.

I have never seen fear take hold of an animal so quickly before in my life.

One of them wasn't even close, but the moment it saw me coming around the corner it started darting off in any direction it could think of in order to get away. I passed them, and thought to myself,

"Wow, I'm so glad that I don't live in that kind of fear".

 I have been living with fear of the future for a few years now but guess what, whether I like it or not, the future is coming right around the corner.

The future will forever scare me. The unknown is a frightening concept.

I can try to run off in any direction to get away from it, but it's still going to come.

Knowing that, wouldn't it be so much better to face it with faith rather than with fear?

God has said that faith and fear cannot exist in the same place. I love God, so I choose faith. I know that God is with me, and will be forever.

That is all I need to put one foot in front of the other, and follow my Savior, knowing that because of Him,

"there is always hope smiling brightly before me".

It's hard to sit back, and let it all happen. It's hard to wait. But knowing that God knows best, and that He has a plan for me,

one that equals happiness is what gets me through.

~TR

CHRISTmas

God not only lives, but He loves us. He loves you. Everything He does is for our good and protection. There is evil and sorrow in the world, but there is no evil or harm in Him. 

He is our Father - a perfect Father - and He will help us find refuge from the storm. 

Jeffery R. Holland

GRAPPLE

The first time I saw this word it was for a new creation. Apples that smelled and tasted like Grapes. Therefore they were known as GRAPPLES. Makes sense.

Then I was reading and this phrase stuck out to me.
'Grapple the hard things in life.'

Do apples and grapes help us with the challenges of life?

So of course I looked in the dictionary.

Grapple

1. to hold or make fast to something

2. to engage in a struggle or close encounter
3. to try to overcome or deal
4. a grip or close hold in wrestling

We need to grasp the hard things in life and keep them alongside of us so that we know exactly what we are up against. Its the only way for us to keep our head held high and know that there are great things ahead.

Then I got thinking about GRAPPLES

Its funny how apples and grapes really do help us with the challenges of life.

APPLES-
The fruit of the forbidden tree
Knowledge of good and evil
To understand the purpose of life we need oppostition
The Lord is a respector of your agency from the very beginning

GRAPE-
Wine, The Sacrament
The Saviors Atonement!

Phillppians 4:13

I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me

MASTER CARVER

How s l o w the forming-

How HARD some blows-

But I, the stone, must come to know

In my own person, my own soul,

Thy will, Thy purpose here below.

O Master, now I plead to Thee,

Cut off my roughness, form my face,

Refine my feelings, make of me

A fit reflection of Thy grace.

Yea, haste the day when I may kneel

Before Thee and great Elohim,

Accepted, peaceful in Thy home,

At last like Thee each grain of stone.

J. Devin Cornish

The Atonement

Ive been studying the Atonement for the past year or so.
A dear friend of mine shared this with me.

We know that on some level Jesus experienced the totality of mortal existence in Gethsemane. It's our faith that He experienced everything- absolutely everything. Sometimes we don't think through the implication of that belief. We talk in great generalities about the sins of all humankind, about the suffering of the entire human family. But we don't experience pain in generalities. We experience it individually. That means Jesus knows what it felt like when your mother died of cancer- how it was for your mother and how it still is for you. He knows what it felt like to lose the student body election. He knows that moment when the brakes locked and the car started to skid. He experienced the gas chambers of Dacau. He experienced Napalm in Vietnam. He knows about drug addiction and alcoholism... his last recorded words to His disciples were, "And lo, I am with you always even unto the end of the world." What does that mean? It means He understands your mothers pain when your five years old leaves for kindergarten, when a bully picks on your 5Th grader, when your daughter calls to say the new baby has Down Syndrome... He knows the pain you live with when you come home to a quiet apartment where the only children who ever come are visitors, when your hear that your former husband and his new wife were sealed in the temple last week, when your 50Th wedding anniversary rolls around and your husband has been dead for two years. He knows all that. He's been there. He's been lower than all that.

Chieko N Okazaki

Lessons from my Father

I look forward to those random moments when something my father would said to us girls over and over again and then within a matter of time~ what he says actually makes sense.

My father would always say, "Pain in good, it lets you know that you are alive."

Who in their right mind would want more pain?

My father was talking more a the lines of physical pain. Working on the farm and living in a household with 10 girls, you are lucky if you don't break a nail~ let alone get 5 new bruises from something or someone.

I got thinking about this statement and the different aspects of pain. Spiritual pain.

The Savior suffered the Atonement for us.

For the most part, we can't comprehend the actually pain the Savior went through.

ALMA 7:11-13

And He shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith He will take upon Him the pains and sicknesses of His people.

And He will take upon Him death, that He may loose the bands of death which binds his people; and He will take upon Him their infirmities, that His bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that He may know according to the flesh how to succor His people according to their infirmities.

Now the Spirit knoweth all things; nevertheless the Son of God suffereth according to the flesh that He might take upon Him the sins of His people, that He might blot out their transgressions according to the power of His deliverance; and now behold, this is that testimony which is in me.

LOVE & PAIN

What if there is LOVE that we can't comprehend ?

The Savior was willing and able to perform the Atonement for us.

He loves us more than we will ever know so He suffered beyond our understanding.

"Pain is good, it lets you know you are alive. "

The pain our Savior went through was "good" and because of it we are able to "live" with our Father in Heaven and our Savior once again

This I know more than I know anything else.

At what point in His mortal life can you see an instance when it was easy for Him?

Education for Real LiFe

Just when I thought all was lost....

"Your life is carefully watched over, as was mine. The Lord knows both what He will need you to do and what you will need to know. He is kind and He is all-knowing. So, you can with confidence expect that He has prepared opportunities for you to learn in preparation for the service you will give. You will not recognize those opportunities perfectly, as I did not. But when you put the spiritual things first in your life, you will be blessed to feel directed toward certain learning and you will be motivated to work harder. You will recognize later that your power to serve was increased, and you will be grateful."

President Eyring

Something I learned today...

Folly of Materialism

Material scientist use the forces of nature to make the environment of man better and more comfortable.

Spiritual scientist use mind-power to enlighten the soul. (Mind power shows man the way to inner happiness, which gives him immunity to outer inconveniences.)

WHICH one renders the greater service?

Tribute to my sisters!

Even though we've changed and we're all finding our own place in the world, we all know that when the tears fall or the smile spreads across our face, we'll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us, nothing will EVER change, so much to the point where we're not all still friends.

TRANSITION

So its been awhile since I last posted, reason being...... several things have gotten in the way; family, holidays, turkey, knee surgery, pain meds, physical therapy, graduation, and lack of inspiration.

I was reading somewhere ( sorry I can't credit the source ) and it seem to fit perfectly with the "transition" I am currently going through.

All of us are either in quiet transition, the storm of tumultuous change, or simply find within ourselves a prompting that we must seek a different, more peaceful avenue upon which to travel the rest of our lives.

Its funny how I see myself at [the point above] numerous times within my life. Yet it always seem to be the biggest or most major choice at [that] particular time.

WHY?

I was talking with my grandmother the other day and she shared some thoughts with me. Here are a few that I love.

God approved of this trial and pain. A long time ago so did I.

God always lifts us up over the rough spots.

Never forget who wore the crown of throns.

Christ is in no hurry. He's at the finish line with the scars.

Instead of wishing you were someone else,

be proud of who you are.

You never know who has been looking at you wishing they were you.

Life is like a roller coaster ride,

It has its u p S and D o w n s.

But its your choice to SCREAM or enjoy the ride.

I think the only reason why people HOLD onto memories so tight, for so l o n g is because memories are the only things that dOn'T change, even when people do.

We'll never forget you. You're totally awesome!

My days here at Columbia High are coming to a close.

Here is another gift I received from 12 of my students.

CARD

I'm going to miss you SO much! I will never forget you! Keep on dreaming (wink) ... but please please come back and teach. Please with cherries on top!! Oh and good luck with your knees!

Ms. Barnes

I will miss you and your funny farm stories and hilarious faces!

Ms. Barnes
Hope everything goes good on your graduation. You were and awesome teacher! Hope you come back because you always made us laugh and cheered us up!

Ms. Barnes

We'll miss you. Hope you will come back!

I'm going to miss you very much. I had a lot of fun, when you taught. You're very funny. Ms. Barnes you're going to be a good, (NO) a very good teacher.

Don't forget to come back and visit! Love you and I'll miss you bunches!

Hey Ms. Barnes!
I am very sad you're leaving but I hope you have fun in Utah!

Have fun getting your manicure and eating them cupcakes!

You are the bomb dawg! You will make such an amazing teacher! You will be so missed!

Well it was nice meeting you. Hope you had a blast with us! Miss you!

Hey Miss!
Well we are going to miss you! Hope you like it!

Ms. Barnes

You're the best student teacher ever! You're super pretty and sweet!

GIFT
Big stuffed teddy bear holding and AVOCADO! My favorite red velvet cupcakes and a gift card to get my nails done!

I hate saying good byes! So my thought was to just slip away without the students knowing.

Littled did I know that my students WANT to say good bye. So I am letting them... even though it takes everything in me not to cry in front of them.

Is it worth it?

Today I received this note from one of my students.

Ms. Barnes,
We would love to get you a little gift for how good of a student teacher you are. WE want to show our appreciation by giving you a red velvet cake/cupcake/little cupcakes since we got you to tell us your favorite dessert Ha! Ha! :) But we need to know what kind of frosting.... we insist on getting you an appreciation gift so there is not talking us out of it. So anyways let us know and thank you for helping us when we needed it.

Sincerely,
Hannah and Erin

Teaching as a Profession

Before I started teaching, I thought anyone could be a good teacher. I was going to touch young loves and be every one's favorite teacher. Students would come to me and share their secrets. I would prepare and deliver meaningful lessons that would change lives.

No one told me what teaching was really going to be like.

I never knew that I would spend infinite evening planning lessons that would be met with rolling eyes and groans. I never knew that in the rare case that a new lesson went off brilliantly, only to be interrupted with fire alarms, unwanted visitors or random pep assembles. I never knew how many homework assignments could be "lost" and how happy I would be for it ment less grading for me. I didn't realize that I would often feel more stress over giving a failing grade to a student than the student receiving it. I didn't know that students wouldn't always give me the respect I though all teachers deserved.

No one told me that I would be haunted at night with the stress of presentation and deliver of tomorrows lessons.

What I now know after student teaching.

I now know the satistfaction of creating a lesson that causes the light bulb to turn on for several students. I know how it feels to work in an atmosphere with other intelligent and like-minded staff who pull together and help one another. Talk about first impressions. I was thrilled to be involved with a great school district starting day one. I appreciate when a "thank you" escapes a smiling face or when a discipline strategy is caught not taught. I know I can't solve all my students' problems, but I have seen that listening to and encouraging them are gifts I can give. During my breaks, I find myself wondering how "my students" are doing.

Most of all, I did not know that I would feel so needed. Someone once told me that teaching happens in one-on-one relationships. I find myself teaching my students that they are capable and able to learn and that's why I am here.

My time here student teaching has been more varied then I have realized. No two days are the same. No two students are the same. My days have been filled with planning lessons, grading assignments, following through on discipline issues, and keeping up on individual students needs.

I forgot why I became a teacher......... because I care deeply about cultivating minds and spirits.

There aren't many people who get to witness these profound changes in people on a daily basis.

Your Worth

is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work.

And the only way to do great work is to

love what you do.

If you haven't found it yet, keep looking, and don't settle.

As with all matters of the heart

you will know when you find it.

~Steve Jobs

Even if the path is a little b l u r r y, Keep Walking.

You'll FOCUS in when you know what you want.

Then the picture of your life will be crystal C L E A R .

Just don't ever give up and don't ever stop w a l k i n g.